Thursday, February 4, 2010

Restoring Love & Passion back into your marriage

This week we had a great guest speaker, Jen Lovelady. She is a wife, mother, friend & business owner. She is the author of her own blog with some great stories, ideas, funny videos etc. http://jenlovelady.com/ . As the busy mom of 4 children ages 3.5 - 13yrs old she knows what it's like trying to maintain that relationship with your husband when life is so busy with your house, kids, and business/job.

She spoke on Restoring Love & Passion back into our marriages. Below you will find an overview of what she spoke on.

In your marriage you have to set boundaries. Four things can become intrusive to a marriage and sometimes require boundaries.

1. Work or business - especially if you work at home
2. Friendships
3. Perfect house - it's okay to not have a perfect house
4. Hobbies - sometimes these can get in the way


You make it a high priority to be committed to make your marriage work.
This is a sentence that she told us to post up somewhere and remind ourselves of daily, weekly, and monthly. It will help us to maintain a healthy marriage.
Is your husband a Top priority in your home/relationship?


When he comes home he wants to see his wife not his mom.

Control your thoughts about your husband - you are committed to him and there is no exit strategy. Do not compare him to other husbands.


You have to be intentional & consistent!


8 Loves she has when it comes to her children & then 8 ways to apply these loves to your husband.
1. Loves to hear her children say "Please" and "Thank You" - especially in public
A. Do you tell your husband Thank You or please? Do you do it in public or in front of your children?

2. Loves planning birthdays or events for her children.
A. Do you plan special events/birthdays for your husband?

3. Loves making her kids favorite meals.
A. Do you make your husbands favorite meal or have his favorite snack always on hand?

4. Loves special moments with her kids
A. Do you share those special moments with your husband? Do you have special moments with him?

5. Loves watching her kids play sports or be successful, cheering them on.
A. Are you your husbands biggest fan? Do you encourage him?

6. Loves complementing her children
A. Do you compliment your husband? Do you do it in front of others or your children? Men need to hear this from their wives.

7. Loves when her children tell them about their day
A. Do you listen enthusiastically to your husband as he recalls his day?

8. Loves to give her kids love notes.
A. Do you give leave your husband love notes/texts/cards? Do you show him expressions of love?


As a mom our Adoration that we once had for our husbands can be shifted to our children and often times our husbands get put on the back burner. Our first priority should be our husband and then our children. He needs to know that he is a priority & just as important as the children and not second rate.

She then challenged us before Valentines day to do the following:
1. Plan a date night/afternoon/breakfast/coffee date with our husbands. We need to start dating our husbands again. Get back to when we first started dating. And not talk about the children on our date!
2. Compliment your husband at least 1x every day

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